I know it’s been a while.
I don’t have much to share, other than the fact that I am moving to second grade!
I’m rather excited, and have already started moving into my new classroom. Luckily, I’m moving into a classroom that is not in use this year, so I’ve been slowly taking my things in over the last week and will continue to do so until the end of school.
Mine more days of school left!
Love. Love. Learn.
Roxana
I’m very lucky to have a mother who has always supported me and wanted the best for me. She is my best friend and I can always turn to her for advice, help, or a shoulder to lean on. I’m thankful beyond words for having her in my life.
We all went out for lunch today and spent time together, but in the back of my mind, all I can think about is the IUI we were supposed to be having this weekend.
But it’s okay… I have my loving fur babies to love on and cuddle with :). Maybe next year things will be different.
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
We started our higher dosage of Gonal-F last night! I’m very hopeful that I will respond to the medication, I just hope we don’t take too long to find the right dosages for each medication.
It may be in my head again.. But I have felt very heavy today. All. Day. Long. My pants feel extra tight and are leaving imprints on my tummy :(. I’ve also had an upset stomach since taking my injections last night. My stomach doesn’t hurt whatsoever, it’s just upset. Upset stomach is not listed as a side effect of Gonal-F, though, so I’m thinking it’s probably all in my head.
I go in for my 3rd E2 and my first follicular ultrasound tomorrow. Please think positive thoughts for us 😘!
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
10:20 AM
Three follies on the right.
Two follies on the left.
I’m on CD8, but all follicles measure 10mm or smaller. This isn’t good.
I don’t naturally have a menstrual cycle or ovulation, so my doctor will continue my “cycle” as long as he needs to allow my follicles to grow to the size they need to be… As long as my E2 is increasing. If it isn’t, we may have to start over. I’m not sure that’s an option right now, because it’s so expensive.
We’ll know by 3PM.
4:15PM
Nurse called at 2:30, and I missed it.
I asked my partner teacher to watch my class so I could use the restroom, and made a beeline to listen to the voicemail. I sat in the stall and cried for a minute, picked myself up, brushed myself off, and went back to my room like nothing was wrong.
Although we had follicles this morning in our US, my E2 has only increased to 25 (from 14), so my RE has decided it’s best to cancel our cycle and “start fresh” with a higher dosage from the start.
I don’t know what to think.
I’m lost. I’m confused. I’m exhausted. I’m drained. I’m hurt.
We spent so much money, just to have our doctor not have us on a high enough dose and then cancel on us. That being said, we will either be trying another cycle with higher doses, or we will just move forward with adoption. (Most likely the latter.)
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
I’m so confused.
I had my first E2 on 5/5 and measured a 27. Since them, I’ve been on 75IU Menopur and 75IU Gonal-F, but my E2 measured at 14 this morning.
I start 150IU Gonal-F tonight, and stay on 75IU Menopur.
Has this happened to anyone before? Why/how could it decrease?
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
I’ve read that gonadotropin injections can cause women to have “PMS” type symptoms and to be moody and cranky. I feel quite the opposite, however. I feel especially happy and light hearted the past few days. The injections don’t hurt like I thought they would and hubby has been so amazing… What could I possibly be moody about?
Had my second E2 lab this morning. My first draw before injections measured 27! The nurse on duty this morning told me that on CD6 with just 3 days of injections, I should be expecting a measurement between 100-300. Fingers are crossed. I’ve been feeling very “full” and “heavy,” so I hope I’m responding as planned!
Have a marvelous Monday!
Live. Love. Laugh.
Roxana
I’ve been talking about our IF journey a lot with my cousin. And although she’s not an “infertile”, she’s always been the person who understands how I feel and is always a shoulder of support for me. I feel so comfortable talking to her about everything without feeling judged. I showed her the pictures of my bruised injection site (photo in previous blog), and she sent me the text message I posted above. She’s right… I had never thought of it that way. My pricks and bruises are proof of baby dust, and hopefully, soon will be replaced by stretch marks.
I am so lucky to have such an amazing cousin.
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
Hubby just gave me my first Menopur and Gonal-F injections, and I must admit that it wasn’t as bad as I had thought it would be. The Menopur had me completely terrified because I’ve read that it is also known as “The Painful Medicine.” It honestly wasn’t that bad.. But it sure did burn for a little while! The injections weren’t so bad, in general, because I iced the area beforehand. That really helped!
It’s probably in my head, but I’m already feeling some fullness in my ovaries. How long until you start feeling the symptoms of the injections? Can’t possibly be an hour, right?
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
So THIS is what it’s going to be like.
*I woke up to this bruising the next morning:*
*Second day… Super ouch! At least it doesn’t hurt much.
Last night, my injections weren’t so bad. I hardly had any pain at all (other than the Menopur burn), but tonight… Ouch! We injected on my right side tonight, and I could immediately tell that the Menopur site would bruise, because I had a little bit of bleeding afterwards. I applied pressure, but it now looks red and sore :(. Could we have hit a blood vessel? My Gonal was a bugger tonight too – no bleeding with it.. but, boy was it a pain! I posted yesterday that I feel fullness in my abdomen, and that still holds true. After my injections (for 3-4 hours), I feel fullness in my abdomen. Essentially, my ovaries “feel heavy.” This can’t be the case, however.. Because everything I’ve read and have been told is that the medication takes 4-7 days to cause that feeling. I feel like it can’t be in my head either though, because it’s the second night in a row that I’ve felt like this. Maybe this is just how my body responds to the drugs? I’m hoping this means good things!
This was a tough weekend for us to start injectables. I’ve been babysitting and staying overnight (Friday and tonight) for a family I’ve been watching for 5 or so years while mom and dad are on a mini vacation and Hubby has had to drive 30 minutes out of his way every night to come give me my injections (and a kiss 😘), because we all know I’m too much of a sissy to do them myself.
I’ve had to rig my sharps container with a strip of tape so that the sharps don’t fall into my overnight bag. If I press the top completely closed, it locks into place. Has anyone found an easier way to deal with this than what I’ve done?
… Janky, I know!
Although I’m uncomfortable and still pretty terrified of needles, I’m realizing that they are a necessary evil in my life. I feel a lot of pride when I hear the jingle coming from my container 😀. I know I’m not alone in that. I’m working hard over here to make a baby!
With my entire being,
My whole heart,
And with all my hopes and dreams…
I hope this makes us parents.
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
I’ve had one late arrival and one early departure from school this week, and have three late arrivals scheduled for next week for labs and ultrasounds. My team has been so great, and understanding. They’re completely okay with me splitting my class and 4-5 of my kids joining their class until I get in to work. I’m so thankful for my understanding colleagues. Having them makes this process so much less stressful. I’m also extremely thankful for my principal, who allows me to attend my appointments I need to.
Today has me feeling very thankful and positive. I know we haven’t waited nearly as long as some of you, but we’ve been trying since we got married (knowing we would have difficulty). The past two and a half years have been full of uphill battles, tears, and frustration. I didn’t think that this day would ever get here for us. I can’t believe that this is finally happening.
Live. Love. Learn.
Roxana
Live.Love.Fully 